Yes, YOU are “Good Enough”

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Olivia recently attended a friend’s birthday party.  However, when I asked her how the party was, she did not mention whether the cake was vanilla or chocolate, whether or not her friend liked her presents, or whether she had fun during the sleepover or not.

Instead, she told me how she felt judged as not “Asian enough”.  Somehow being half Chinese/ half Filipino, not able to speak either Chinese or Filipino, and not been to China or the Philippines are black marks against her. “White-washed”, she called herself.  

She was measured and she came up short. 

I find this subject really tiresome since this feeling of not being “enough” is really based on other people’s prejudices and biases…but here we are.

But wait.  I know exactly where Olivia is coming from.  In my mind’s eye, I remember the crippling thoughts just because someone said something and I latched on to their biases…

“I am…

        not smart enough…

                  NOT pretty enough…

                             NOT worthy ENOUGH…

                                                  NOT ENOUGH.”

Just not enough.

Yet, I wanted to yell at her.

“You are smarter than this!  Why would it matter if you are half Chinese, half Filipino, whether you speak the language or not, or whether you’ve gone back to countries where we no longer have family ties?”

But before I could say a word, Olivia said,

“Nah, I’m good. Doesn’t matter what people say.  Totally irrelevant.”

That’s my girl.

So, my dear friends, when you start feeling insecure and doubts start creeping in, ask yourself, as Michelle Obama did at one point in her life,

“Am I good enough?  YES, I AM.”

Have a good week ahead, everyone!

Debbie.

 

 

 

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“Jupiter Ascending”…Not really

I’m going to be honest, I’m a Trekkie. (ˈtrekē/ noun-informal: a fan of the US science fiction television program Star Trek.)

I vividly remember practicing Spock’s Vulcan salute with the famous line “Live long and prosper” until my hand hurt. Oh, and how can I forget the Vulcan Mind Meld…”my mind to your mind; my thoughts to your thoughts.”

Super cool…

So, when I received an email from Netflix saying “We just added a movie you might like”..and it has the name of a planet (aka Jupiter), I’m intrigued.

Jupiter Ascending. Catchy name.

It is a movie about a young lady named Jupiter (so, not the planet!) who helps her family clean houses. Little does she know that she actually comes from a long line of intergalactic royalty and she holds the future of Earth in her hands.  The movie is mishmash of aliens, a genetically engineered bodyguard, a youth serum trade, and bees and other out-of-this world ideas.

I’m sorry to say that I would give this movie 1.5 out of 5 stars.

Well, that’s 2 hours I will never get back but this movie did give me pause….

As I was watching the movie, I could not quite understand why Jupiter didn’t seem to relish the idea that she was SPECIAL!

I mean, you are from a long line of alien royalty, you get to go into outer space, be in a space ship….you even OWN a planet!

Wow!  Except for bad aliens trying to kill you, what’s not to be excited about?

There are some days when I wake up and think “there must be some mistake…I AM destined to do great things, right? So, how come my life seems so boring?”

It’s like when I saw a trailer of the new movie “Fantastic Beasts and Where to find them”.  Jacob,the Muggle, sums it all up when he wistfully says  “I want to be a Wizard.”

I mean, who wouldn’t want to be a wizard or own a planet?

In thinking about this some more, I think it’s not about being grateful. I wake up grateful everyday and I thank my lucky stars that I am alive, I have a roof above my head and food to eat, have a family who loves me, I live in a country which doesn’t have a bully as its leader, I could go on and on…

No.  This is not about being grateful.

This goes much deeper.

It is about feeling SPECIAL.

BEING SPECIAL.

Hmmmm…Interesting.  I’m thinking there is some deep deep insecurity buried somewhere in my psyche that I need to look at the next time I meditate.

…or maybe, I am again overthinking everything and as I learned in my mindfulness practice that this feeling shall pass…impermanence.

It was just a silly movie, after all.

At any rate… Live long and prosper.

Have a good weekend everyone!!

Debbie.

PS:  I STILL wish I was a wizard….