S.T.O.P. –A refresher…

 

o-STOP-SIGN-facebook

I had a little argument with Olivia on our way to school this morning.

I didn’t have time to make her lunch and I was a feeling a little vulnerable since I knew I have not been a model parent these past few days. I was on a training course and we were off our usual routine.  Although I get home earlier than usual, I do not seem to have enough time to do laundry, put away the dishes, or go for a run.

Although…I seem to have time for two glasses of wine and cheese, check the Raptors game, do some Amazon surfing for some retail therapy, sleep later than usual, etc…

At any rate, some consequences have certainly been felt the mornings after….I’ve been oversleeping, Olivia scrambling for clean jeans, no time to sit down and have breakfast (or even packing lunch), and both of us grumpy and testy in the morning.

I knew she was going through a rough patch too…she was worried she didn’t study enough for her Spanish test, she has a history project to work on, a finance test for DECA Ontario (an extracurricular finance club for young and upcoming junior executives), a math test to study for  (trigonometry, as I recall) and she was having some trouble prioritizing which one to deal with first….

Anyway, she said, “I’m hungry.”

For some reason, I took this negatively.  I immediately responded that we should really do better at planning our mornings or even consider laying out our clothes the night before and she should give me some ideas on what she would want for breakfast or lunch instead of relying on me to read her mind…and how late did she stay up last night that maybe she should be waking up earlier in the morning?

…all in my “pissed off” and “accusing” tone.

Silence on the passenger side.

Then I realized that with all the mindfulness practice and mantras I have in my arsenal, there are still times when I fall off the wagon and I revert back to old habits of mindlessness.

Anyway, I dropped her off and said, “Have a good day, honey”.  At this point, I was hoping that she had forgiven me for my outburst.  As I was waiting for the train heading downtown, I remembered one of the simplest techniques in my arsenal that I should have done:

S.T.O.P.

S–stop and take a time out; pause

T–take a slow breath in and out. Take another one, for good measure.

O-observe what is happening inside you. Were you holding your breath? How about your shoulders–were they tense and up? Just notice. No judging.

P-proceed; having checked into what is happening, continue with whatever you were doing.  Maybe, just maybe…you are feeling calmer and clearer to deal with the present situation.

Anyway, as I write this blog on the train on the way home (the course finished early! yay!), I remind myself that there will be times when I will fall off the wagon, but it is okay.

I can always begin again.

Next time, I hope that I remember to STOP… before I blow things out of proportion.

Hopefully, you will too….

Have a good rest of the week, everyone!

Debbie.

 

 

 

Making a difference…

My daughter came home from dinner over at a friend’s house and the first thing she said was “We had moose steak for dinner.”

Oh…quite exotic, I must say.

Then she said that Julia (the middle child of the family) created quite a discussion over dinner by saying “Dad, you had kill a moose for dinner.. how could you?”.

“Dad” hunts deer, moose, and goes fishing in the northern most parts of Canada once or twice a year…takes the kill to the butcher who magically transforms it to steaks, ground meat, filets, etc. to be consumed throughout the year.

…Julia’s dad, being the smart aleck we knew him to be…said “Well, we spared a cow’s life  by eating this moose.”

Julia is only 11 but my daughter says Julia has decided to go vegetarian when she is older. She says “animal lives matter”…

But, right now, she has to eat moose steak for dinner.

My daughter concludes “Julia is passionate about animals but I believe we have to think bigger…we have to take care of the planet we live in. What good is saving animals if we kill Planet Earth?”

Fighting words indeed.

My daughter then went on a rant of her own about how Man has completely destroyed the environment and showed me a Youtube video of a rapper named Prince EA. In his Youtube Video “Man vs Earth” he shows us what we have done to Mother Nature including global warming and deforestation of the Amazon.  Check it out…it is quite compelling.

My daughter has resolved that minimizing our carbon footprint is a good way to start. So, in the coming weeks, we are making sure recyclable items are recycled in the blue bin, compostable items go into the compost heap in the backyard or in the green bin, minimize the use of plastics including bringing our own bags when grocery shopping,  and maybe plant a tree in the backyard.

I am so proud and extremely happy to see her passionately support a worthy cause. Actually, it is a similar feeling when I see in the news about our future generation supporting causes to end poverty, women’s rights, access to clean water, etc.

“You are going be quite an activist when you are older…” I said smiling.

“I would need lots of money to make a difference though…” she said sadly.

“…no, no, NO!!”, I silently screamed.

Has this world really gone to hell that money is necessary for things to happen? To make a difference?

That is actually quite distressing if you really think about it….that only the rich can make a difference? Could you imagine a world full of Donald Trumps who turns a blind eye to global warming or thinks climate change is a myth?

…by the way, I never really understood why Donald Trump is considered a “billionaire” when he has declared “corporate bankruptcy” four times (the fact that The Donald deliberately distinguishes that from “personal bankruptcy” is really ridiculous….it is eerily reminiscent of Bill Clinton’s infamous “I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky..”)……Right.

Anyway, I digress.

At any rate, I refuse to believe that to make a difference in this world that we really NEED money. It would be helpful, but it’s not necessary, or is it??

I think that if all of us reduce our own carbon footprint (for even just a little), it will make a big difference over time.  Recycling more, using less plastic, and mindfully thinking about our impact to our community are all…..FREE.

I think we just need a little jumpstart of the “hidden activists” within all of us.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Debbie.